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The Projectionist

from Leave on the Lights by Parker Ainsworth

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i know i haven't been supportive in the past
a dilapidated theater always threatening to collapse
littered at the entry old ticket stubs and chewing gum
and velvet rope stanchions then ushered us on
once graciously invited toward the creaky seats
every step taken a picture focused on the screen
there projected in your eyes came alive the cruelest fears i'd grown to know in several life times
as all the monsters of my doubts and criticisms screamingly clear attacking whats most close and dear
yelling stop to the projectionist who slowly turned to hear my objections then
when i finally met his gaze my stomach dropped miles below the floor, beneath his mask he wore my face
surrendering to silence tears gushed in violence i felt toward myself which was the cause of this i saw
i never wished to cast what's poisoned me into another soul especially yours, a goddess queen
day after day i forgive myself for that
if practice makes perfect i'm a forgiver,
forgiveness now my craft
as for the movie house inside my head that held the dark?
i burned it down, built an amusement park inside my heart
for all the roller coasters, carousels and ferris wheels
serve to shake me from my memories and remember how real life feels...

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from Leave on the Lights, released December 11, 2011

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Parker Ainsworth Los Angeles, California

“Parker Ainsworth has the voice of a man whose lived many lives in one lifetime. He’s a mystic wandering bard…you can hear the Texan smoke in his voice and his finger picking should be studied. He’s a painter with words and his palette is plentiful. I was a fan in an instant.” ~ NohoArtsDistrict ... more

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